5/3/2011
LADIES. You have been lied to. All those doctors and books and Hollywood movies that talk about “morning sickness” like it is just a passing nuisance are definitely involved in a conspiracy to get women to continue to have babies. “Morning Sickness” does not exist. “24/7 Sickfest” does . You see, I was naïve and thought “okay, so for a few weeks I wake up, throw up, eat a cracker, and then get on with my day.” AND THE UNIVERSE LAUGHED. I now know that you wake up nauseous. You are nauseous ALL DAY LONG. There might be a small, 20 minute window where you feel like eating at all—that’s when I try to eat more whole days’ worth of calories—then it is back to Sickfest. Outside that window, NOTHING sounds good. Just thinking about food, even foods that I normally love, makes me sick. Even the food that I ate last night—which I HAD TO HAVE—today makes me want to vom. And crackers, ginger ale, sea-sick bands, you name it, I’ve tried it. The only time I am not sick is when I am asleep and for about 10 minutes right after I wake up.
Lots of people tell me, “oh, that’s a great sign, means the baby is healthy.” Which is a little comforting, but of course the flip side of that is if the next day I do not feel as sick, I worry that it means something bad has happened. It’s a vicious cycle.
I know in the previous post I was all “whatever it takes for a healthy baby.” That’s still true, but I am exercising my right as a human incubator to complain about how unfair the “whatever” part has become. I will have my revenge, though. Someone is totally eating lots of strained peas and beets.
5/10/2011
The interwebs are a dangerous place for a paranoid pregnant lady like myself. There is just too much information out there about “avoid this, don’t do that, don’t eat that OR YOUR BABY WILL DIE.” Yikes. I am pins-and-needles enough as it is, and now you tell me that the Subway I had last week might give my baby LISTERIA?
There are good and bad side to the internet. On the advice of many friends, I found a website that I liked with a message board community where other expectant moms can talk things out and support each other. I like Babycenter.com more than some of the other sites. This has helped in that I found a small group who have experienced an ectopic and another group for girls expecting in December who have had a previous loss. These December babies are our “Rainbow Babies,” which I think is a great term for the miracle that has occurred after the darkest days. I like these groups, but again they sometimes give me a lot to worry about. Members drop out every now and then as they experience another loss. They describe their experience, and then I compare everything I am feeling to that and start to FREAK OUT OH MY GOD. I’ve stopped reading those posts—just for my own sanity. It does give me a lot to pray about, however, both lifting up these women that are suffering and thanking God that today, I am still pregnant.
AND THEN there are the women in the regular December Birth group that have never had a problem and are so cute and naïve like I once was. Like asking for name opinions at 5 weeks pregnant. Taking pictures of their stomachs because they are “showing at 6 weeks.” All optimistic and cheery, believing that their whole pregnancy is going to be a walk in the park. Oh, to be that person again. To not worry at every cramp, over analyze whether your symptoms are less than yesterday and WHAT DOES THAT MEAN, to just be blissful and happy. To be able to answer a simple question of “When are you due” with just “December” instead of “if all goes right, December.”
Kurt is threatening to turn off my internet until 14 weeks. Maybe not the worst idea ever?
5/19/2011
What does early pregnancy feel like? Imagine your worst hangover. Like that one time in college when you went to the Jungle Juice party but it’s college so it was pure Hawkeye and you drank about half the cooler and then thought it was a good idea to go to the bar at 1AM for shots and then somehow made it home with a gyro in hand only to pass out on the second floor landing with your pants half off? Remember the next morning? When you puked so much that at one point you thought you saw your appendix come out and then proceeded to just lay on the floor for the next 6 hours just begging for death? And friend offer you a wide range of supposed hangover foods—Jimmy Johns, McDs, burgers, etc—but the thought of each just sends you back in to the toilet stall?
Yeah, like that. For about 10 weeks straight.
5/20/2011
If wearing maternity pants at 10 weeks is wrong, then I don’t want to be right.
Most women want to stay in their tiny pants as long as possible. Ladies, there is no award for making yourself pointlessly uncomfortable by shoving your bloated belly into your old pants. LET IT GO. Embrace the maternity pants. Make out with them. Let them get to second base. Trust me, it’s worth it.
First, maternity fashions have come a long way in the past decade. You can’t even tell what are or are not maternity pants unless you see the top. So you can wear them undetected. And you stomach will thank you. The best part is there is no zipper or buttons, so you can pee in record time.
I had to make the switch because my pants were already tight pre-pregnancy. I admit freely that I gained about 12 pounds after losing the first baby. I’m a mood eater. I was working on losing them, but still had a few to go when I got the positive. Then I started bloating like the Goodyear Blimp, so my tight pants were bye-bye till next year pants.
Come on, this is your chance to be comfortable for once! Relish it early and often. I know I am!
